Hello, my name is ***** and I have trust issues.

So I’m currently dating a pretty amazing guy. Caring, beautiful teeth, flawless skin, affectionate, likes to cuddle, always keeps my wine glass full, LOVES BILL MAHER and CNN <-I heart closet nerds!! So far so good. Wait…amazing guy needs a name…hmmmm *ponders* lets call him “Chicago” eventually you’ll learn why. Anyway, Chicago and I pretty much spend every waking moment together when I’m not in class and he’s not working or doing a show so pretty much in the evenings. Which is totally ok with me because late nights mean patio convo, amazing music in the background and lots of grown up beverages which in turn becomes…sleepover time ;o) Snuggles and forehead kisses… *swoon*

Okay…must get back to the point at hand

So last night I send him a text and say…”After your show tonight let’s have a movie date and I’ll bring over carry out” This is usually fine…kind’ve routine but instead he tells me “Hanging out with the boys tonight…lets do something tomorrow.” Now…its perfectly normal for a guy to have guys night…but what raised a small pink flag was the fact that its TUESDAY night…what the hell kinda guys night is Tuesday night. Monday night football is over, The Giants played a 1:15 game today and even IF you’re having ‘guys night’ why can’t I come over AFTER??

I instantly go into…this dude is obviously lying mode. So I text my P I C (partner in crime) “Ok…so he’s full of shit.” she asks why and I tell her my dilemma. She tells me that I can’t be crazy girl and blame him of cheating just because of my insecurities from past relationships (That’s a whole nother’ blog for a whole nother’ day) so we settle on the fact that I should give him the benefit of the doubt and stop trippin’. Better said than done… I stay up until 4am…contiplate doing a quick drive by to see if I notice anything out of the ordinary..but refrain. Yeah…I may have a crazy thought here or there but never want to be labeled one of ‘those’ girls!! Ugggghhh….WHY ME? So, instead I knock back 2 very large glasses of red…doze into a wine coma and have crazy dreams about non-other then Chicago doing the horizontal mambo with some peanut butter colored, black-haired hoochie whose name starts with a “C”…not sure where the “C” part comes from…maybe *unt…(yeah, that was bad…that’s a terrible word) I apologize.

So, I wake up and text my P I C who says…”Girl, that sounds like a women’s intuition” Or maybe I’m just crazy!! So we discuss my dream…I decide I HAVE SERIOUS (yet justified) TRUST ISSUES.

So this leaves us with a few questions that were left unanswered:

1)Can any man truly be trusted?

2)Is this just a Black girl problem or do all women have the same inner ‘Is my man/ the man I’m dating cheating on me?” inner battle.

3)And, are they guilty until proven innocent or innocent until proven guilty?


I have trust issues and it’s really NOT my fault!


Do the games ever stop??

Okay, so you meet someone. Man OR women and you vibe real nice right off the bat. Not one of those crazy “I met you a week ago (you have pretty teeth and flawless skin)” so LETS GET MARRIED!! Cause you’re just a horny hot ball of madness but you really like them…its apparent they like you so why is it that in spite of all of that clarity, emotional connection and just clear cut “I like you.” Why do we still play the game. They call…we don’t answer (you know so you seem busy and weren’t just waiting around) They text but you don’t respond because you don’t wanna seem eager or god forbid lead on that YOU LIKE THEM. If I like you and you like me and all we ever do is play the game then is it safe to say that as a society we are holding ourselves back in the love finding game of life because we’re afraid Mr. or Ms. ‘Right’ may just figure out that you really do like them and that just makes you completly ‘uncool’!!? Sounds pretty ass backwards if you ask me…so I ask this America…Do the games EVER stop??